Sunday, May 25, 2008

A joy and a challenge

Today my feelings are so mixed up! I'm joyful, and I'm melancholy. I'm hopeful and I'm feeling insecure.

Today, my daughter and her father are spending some time together! It has been over four years since my divorce, and I've encouraged my daughter to keep in contact with her father. That, however, hasn't happened much at all in the last 3 years or so.

My daugher is now 18, and will be graduating from high school next month. Somehow, it seems that it is now easier for connection to happen between Cindy and her dad. It's an answer to my prayers, and I'm so happy for them both!

Why is it that a little part of me is afraid that she won't want to be a part of my life as much, now that she is becoming part of her father's life? My daughter has so much love to give, I know that she has enough for both of us.

It IS true, however, and an absolutely ESSENTIAL part of her "growing up", that she won't want to be as much a part of my life now. So, I'm melancholy. The letting go isn't easy. My challenge is to accept my feelings for what they are........ part of the human experience....... and a big part of what makes our lives rich, full, and worth living.

1 comment:

Jayne said...

It is good that Cindy is spending time with her dad, but I can fully understand your feelings as well. But, in the end, there is plenty of love to go around, and she will be the one to benefit. Hugs to you Evelyn. :c)